I Love You Sincerely

"Mungkin ku tak akan bisa jadikan dirimu kekasih yang seutuhnya mencinta. Namun ku relakan diri bila hanya setengah hati kau sejukkan jiwa ini..."

Feeling familiar with that words? I am not gonna play guessing game with you guys. If you feel so familiar after reading that, I may tell you. Itu memang lirik sebuah lagu. Lirik lagunya Ada Band - Setengah Hati.

I really love the lyric, not the whole song. Just that part. Tau lah ya lagu itu uda ada sejak tahun berapa, uda lama banget. Dan potongan lirik itu masih stuck di pikiranku sampai sekarang. Like a spell, the words have their own magic. I was like hypnotized. Begitu dipahami lagi, ngeneeeeees juga ternyata kalo ngalamin yang kayak gitu. Naudzubillahi min dzalik.

The lyric taught us about sincerity. In love. Kerelaan tertentu, unconditional love. Really hard to apply that in your real life. Especially when your special one go away from you. Leave you alone. Broken-heart condition, hurted. Hahahahaha aku pernah mengalami yang seperti itu, tapi nggak parah sih. Dan bukan dengan 'special one' -ku. So it wasn't really torturing.

And now I have my real special one. hehehehe. But to be honest, I am afraid of losing him lately. 

See ya another time, bloggos.

PS: I love you sincerely. To my bf.

Memorable 17 for You:)

Hello societies! Fixed mindset, everything changes when I'm in a relationship.

Including, my sacrifice. Aku nggak pernah merasa perlu repot-repot memikirkan hal-hal seputar hadiah untuk orang yang spesial. Baru sekarang. Ya karena selama itu, sekitar 3 tahun, aku nggak minat buat punya pacar (-_-) Jadi begitu deket hari ultah pacar, tanggal 22 Mei lalu, aku serba ketar-ketir. Dan tingkahku, mulai dari apa yang harus dipersiapkan dan dibeli, jadi serba ekstrem.

I am about to share some pictures of Danial's birthday. Not party, note that. Cuma perayaan kecil-kecilan. Hihihi, a little surprise from me. Ceritanya siang itu dia lagi les fisika sepulang sekolah, tanpa tahu kalo aku lagi merencanakan semuanya sampai matang. Begitu dia mulai les, langsung aku dateng ke rumahnya grudukan bareng Dysta, Jannah, Ujik, Adit, Yulyan. I was glad to see him laughing.

And glad to know that my surprise planning was almost perfectly success! :D Here are some picts:

The birthday cake!

Omagahh, he is laughing! :3 And I'm just giggling awkwardly-_-

 Tiup lilin! Make a wish then :) (aku melongo)

Acara sok romantis: suap-suapan. Aku yang malu-malu kucing dan dia yang santai abis.

CRAZY HANDSOME. Mesmerizing. Speechless.

Oh, done uploading the photos! Yeyyy... Kinda tiring actually, the connection doesn't work so well. But I'm superrr excited. I do love those pictures so bad, good memories of my high school journey. I'll keep that in the photo album, soon. 

Ow! Especially the last photo above. He looks absolutely gorgeous in his simple smile. Ya senyum sederhana banget kan -_- Nggak mengeluarkan banyak energi tapi hasilnya kece terus. Sebenernya sebelahnya itu ada aku, but I think, no need to be posted here. Bukan konsumsi publik :p

That is all for today posting.

Thank you for your generousity. Hope you enjoy reading, anybody deh! Happy to share this beautiful story of my own. Another story next time? Definitely yes.

Bye-bye universe.. Love y'all.

Destiny

Semoga Allah menjadikanku yang terbaik untukmu. Satu-satunya yang terbaik.
Dan sebaliknya.. I really wish for it o:)


For my dear AMD... 




PS: ini posting tersingkatku loh!

Never Give Up On Me

Aku takut...

Takut dengan akhir yang yang tidak bagus. Tidak indah. Tidak menyenangkan.

Padahal aku sudah banyak sekali membayangkan cerita. Menggantungkan harapan di langit-langit.

Tapi kata Tumblr, kalo akhir cerita nggak happy ending berarti bukan akhir, bener ngga sih?

Aku belajar menyayangi ala kadarnya. Nggak berlebihan, tulus. Well, aku punya banyak kekurangan. Semoga perasaanku cukup untuk membuat kamu bisa menerimaku apa adanya.

Tapi sejujurnya... Ini benar-benar yang pertama kali. Maaf aku tidak sempurna dan sering mengecewakan.

Omaga... Aku bertekad kamu jadi yang terakhir. 

Ya, dont give up on me. Never, please... 

When Sagitarius Miss Gemini

I'm exactly sure what my current feelings are called right now

If you ask me, "Are you sure?" in three times, then I will answer it with three times 'Yes of course'.

It just feels like having some fresh air in a new life, after a thousand years being buried in the deep hollow. So 'woaahhhh', relieved. 

Maybe that's because I've found the sun. The spirit, that has a big contribution in forcing me to get out from the darksome scope.

Actually, it's You. Kamu. 

Aku tidak berharap banyak terhadap kata 'Kita'. Aku tidak berharap banyak kepada hari-hari di depan yang menunggu kita menjemput mereka. Aku tidak berharap banyak pada suara tawa. Aku hanya tahu bahwa aku senang menjalani hari-hari denganmu. Aku hanya tahu bahwa aku dan kamu punya sesuatu untuk merubah yang buruk menjadi baik. Kamu tahu perasaan ini? Tidak usah dijawab. Karena aku adalah kamu, dan kamu adalah aku. - Mirdza Annisa ☺

I started to miss you as soon as we said goodbye. Dear Gemini, I like you a lot. Like a lot :)

Sagitarius,

The Lady is Ready to Love Again.

Hello. Sorry for the absence. I'm back to share a thing. It's fenomenal. At least for myself.
I think I am ready to love again.
Bada-bing!

Haha, after that painful time,  baru sekarang aku bisa bergerak lagi. Pelan-pelan memang, mungkin merangkak. Setidaknya aku bisa berhenti melempari sumpah serapah, kata-kata yang sangat bad-judgemental kepada para laki-laki. Dan itu kemajuan yang bagus ;)

I like... someone. No words can describe him perfectly, exactly. Aku menyimpannya rapat-rapat di memori kepala. Dan hati, tentu saja. Aku iseng-iseng buka lirik lagunya Lady Antebellum. Somewhere Love Remains, Ready to Love Again, Cold as Stone dan Love I've Found in You. Judulnya menarik, belum denger lagunya aku udah suka. Terutama yang Ready to Love Again, really pictures my story.

Seems like I was walking in the wrong direction
I barely recognize my own reflection, no
Scared of love but scared of life alone

Seems I've been playing on the safe side baby
Building walls around my heart to save me
But it's time for me to let it go

Yeah, I'm ready to feel now
No longer am I afraid of the fall down
It must be time to move on now
Without the fear of how it might end
I guess I'm ready to love again


Itu aku kasih setengah liriknya, yang lain cuma diulang-ulang kok. How's it?

Terjebak Lagi

Lagi-lagi stuck di keadaan kayak gini. Secara garis besar masalahnya sama.
Tapi kenapa aku lagi Ya Allah?
Aku nggak merebut kebahagiaanmu.
Kalau kamu  merasa aku seperti itu, aku minta maaf.

Aku pasti lepaskan, kalau memang nggak ada harapan.
Terus, kebahagiaanku di mana dong? :")

Cause my best intentions keep making a mess of things. I just wanna fix it somehow.But how many time will it take to get it right?

PS: Ini postingku ke 100 \(´▽`)/ tapi maaf ya isinya kayak gini :)

sadness,

"When I was a little girl, I used to read fairy tales. In fairy tales, you meet Prince Charming and he's everything you ever wanted. In fairy tales, the bad guy is very easy to spot. The bad guy is always wearing a black cape so you always know who he is. Then you grow up and you realize that Prince Charming is not as easy to find as you thought. You realize the bad guy is not wearing a black cape and he's not easy to spot; he's really funny, and he makes you laugh, and he has perfect hair." -Taylor Swift

Another Prince Charming

Soooooo charming.. Can't describe, he's more than word. I'm captivated by you x__X

I wonder... How could he be soo gorgeous? Dan.. tunggu. Itu senyum miring? Dia punya senyum miring? Adorable! Whataya think? (˘⌣˘ )

Ahh, ya. Named Logan Lerman. Of course you've already known him! ~(˘▾˘~) ~(˘▾˘)~ (~˘▾˘)~

blink-blink,

I Want A Guy Like Landon Carter!

Yeah. I think he must behaved like Landon Carter, and faced just like the mixture of Landon Carter-Shane West. Cute plus charming. Gallant, with a proportional body; not a giant. NOT hard-handed and cruel. Normal haircut; no mohawk, neither spike nor long-haired. Polite. Okay, was a troublemaker at school, but then he changes into the warmest guy after knowing me. Punya mata yang "mengintimidasi" dan "berkuasa". You know, yang membuat kita ngga bosan natap matanya. Has sweet, fascinating smile only for me and normal cold smile for other girls. Can be not only a boyfriend, but also a father, a brother, and a bestfriend. Comfortable and easy to talk to. Has a shoulder to cry on, and a calm hug. Romantic, or at least he will do anything that can make me melt like an ice cream. Full of surprises u,u 

The most important thing for him is seeing me smile, and happy ofcourse. No matter how hard, how impossible my dreams are, he will always try and make efforts to make it happen. Never say NO or GIVE UP, just for appearing a smile.

Wow. SUPER WOW. \(ˇ▽ˇ)/

You may think that i'm a freak. But there's no wrong in dreaming, right? Every girl has her own guy-types, me either. But actually, having a guy that really understand girls feeling and think that girls heart are too precious to be offended, are enough. The best and enough for me. He wont break my heart and always besides. And I wont feel the pain of heartbreaking again :")

God, you hear me, you read all my mind ;) I want a guy like that.. Does he exist out there? Mooommmyy, get me one pleasssseeeeee (˘̩̩̩⌣˘̩̩̩) 

begging,

Sweet Randomness

Girl  : We're best friends right?
Boy : Yes, of course.
Girl  : So be honest to me, who do you like?
Boy : No ne. But I love someone.
Girl  : Ohh, she must be very lucky.
Boy : Definitely. I've loved her ever since I met her.
Girl  : Really? Well, since we're best friend, I wanna meet her. Go call her!
Boy : Hm okay.
*The boy takes out his phone, dials her number, and phones her*
Girl  : Wait. Hold on, I think I'm getting a call.
*Answer the phone*
Girl  : Hello..
Boy : Hey, I Love You.


corny,

Shane West and A Walk to Remember

Bonsoir, fellas! I am now enjoying my last free day before having final school exam. Tomorrow is the day, first lesson is Chemistry then ICT. I just feel lousy, because I know I am not great at Chemistry stuffs (⌣_⌣") I planned to study right after my afternoon bath, but the reality isn't walking on the same path. I'm sitting in front of my television, staying tune on HBO. Watch a film. Yes, watch a film, instead of studying. Then I decide to study Chemistry later. Haha..

I wanna review a movie for you. I'm so excited to do that, because I'm watching it now. It maybe an old movie. Kalo ga salah rilis tahun 2002 o__0 And I regret myself of being late to watch it now, 2011. Comments: Grweaat! Fabulous! Sooo romantic (♥ε♥) Ahhh so many comments only in my thought for this movie. Check the movie poster below..

And I have this one too

Oh my God (┌','┐) film ini baguuss banget! Coba sekarang ortuku ga di rumah, aku nonton sendiri, pasti udah nangis. The main story, if you see from the cover, of course, Love. Tapi sebenernya film ini bercerita banyak hal. Cowok bengal yang suka bikin onar, Landon Carter, bisa berubah jadi cowok yang sweet dan yakin akan cita-citanya gara-gara cewek. She's Jamie Sullivan, cewek alim yang cupu, katrok, pakaiannya nggak ngikutin tren mode, but special and brilliant. Jamie mengajarkan banyak hal ke Landon, mulai dari ngapalin dialog drama, akting, menghargai orang lain, sampe ke masalah keyakinan. Awalnya Landon yang ikut-ikutan temennya suka ngeledekin si Cupu Jamie, akhirnya malah jatuh cinta. They were together as a couple. 

Tapi mulai datang konflik. Jamie ternyata mengidap leukimia akut, dan udah pasrah. Dia berhenti berobat selama dua tahun dan bersikap normal sampai ketemu Landon itu. The saddest part of this movie is that Jamie akhirnya meninggal, Landon sendirian. Tapi mereka menikah dulu sebelumnya, dan Jamie jadi cinta terakhir Landon. Meskipun udah meninggal, Landon tetep move on, justru dia berhasil mewujudkan cita-citanya jadi dokter. Dan Jamie tetep menginspirasi dia melakukan segalanya. Wonderful, eh? Landon jatuh cinta pada Jamie karena kagum akan kegigihannya, kepandaiannya dalam berkata-kata, dan bakatnya yang banyak. Terbuka lah matanya kalo Jamie itu ternyata cantik. Cantik hati, dan fisik. That's true love :")

Ohh, whatta sweet story, sweet Landon.. and very touching. Selain dari segi cerita, aku suka juga sama si Landon Carter :3 Diperankan oleh Shane West. Oke, Mandy Moore cantik, tapi aku masih suka laki. So, here is his pict!

Cuuteee isn't it? Okelah, wajahnya mencureng gitu ._. tapi buat aku justru di situ kerennya :D Alisnya deket sama mata, jadi dia pas banget jadi orang jahat. I dont know how old is he now, I haven't searched in Wikipedia, but his acting is amazing! Cowok bengal yang dingin. Cool. And he is gorgeous too! Udah lama aku ga pernah se-obsessed ini sama artis cowok. Terakhir, seingetku si Daniel Radcliffe waktu Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Robert Pattinson, boleh lah, sedikit nge-fans tapi gak freaky. But this one... Uwh (ˇOˇ)-o)ˇзˇ) Aku punya feeling, Shane West mungkin udah tua sekarang.. 27-28 kali ya? Kalo diliat sebenernya Shane West berpotensi tuh jadi Edward Cullen. Ganteng, putih, proporsional, gagah, dan mukanya garang. Kesan pertama yang harus dapet kalo kita liat cowok vampir. Tapi I think waktu casting dia udah terlalu tua, dibanding Robert yang masih 23 waktu itu. So, lose. No problem, You're sweet, that's all ╭(^▽^)╯

Allright guys! Segitu aja movie review-nya. kalian udah nonton A Walk to Remember? Disarankan cepet nonton, key? Aku udah telat 9 tahun. And my feeling is so messing up. Nyesel, kesel, blablabla. Sekarang film itu bahkan udah ga dibahas lagi, jadi aku nikmatin sendirian sementara orang-orang lain mungkin udah pada mblenger. My next planning is read the novel of this movie with the same title written by Nicholas Sparks. Aku ragu masih diterbitin, karena terbit pertama pasti sebelum tahun 2002, but I'll try to contact Gramedia. Well, finish for now, I'll post again another time. Sayonara └(∵)┐

touching,

Telat, Bodo!

White Horse - Taylor Swift

Say you're sorry

That face of an angel

Comes out just when you need it to

As I paced back and forth all this time

Cause I honestly believed in you

Holding on

The days drag on

Stupid girl,

I should have known, I should have known

I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale,

I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet,

Lead her up the stairwell

This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,

I was a dreamer before you went and let me down,

Now it's too late for you and your white horse to come around

Baby I was naive,

Got lost in your eyes

And never really had a chance

My mistake, I didn't know to be in love

You had to fight to have the upper hand

I had so many dreams

About you and me

Happy endings

Now I know

I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale,

I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet,

Lead her up the stairwell

This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,

I was a dreamer before you went and let me down,

Now it's too late for you and your white horse to come around

And there you are on your knees,

Begging for forgiveness, begging for me

Just like I always wanted but I'm so sorry

Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale,

I'm gonna find someone someday who might actually treat me well

This is a big world, that was a small town

There in my rear view mirror disappearing now

And it's too late for you and your white horse

Now it's too late for you and your white horse to catch me now

Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa

Try and catch me now

Oh, it's too late

To catch me now 

I know this moment will come. You run back to me, then apologize for everything you did. Aku tahu? Oh yeah, karena dia bukan orang yang konsisten. Jelas terlihat waktu dia mengambil keputusan itu, dia masih separuh kerasukan. I think he didn't know what he wanted. Tapi aku nggak menyangka akan secepat ini.. Mikir nggak sih aku masih dalam kondisi terpuruk sekarang? Jangka waktunya masih terpaut pendek lho, kamu langsung balik. Haha, nyesel? :)

Kamu bilang "aku ngerasa salah". Harus! Kalo enggak berarti emang hati kamu batu, otak kamu mati. "Aku nyesel" "Gak akan aku ulangi lagi", I have to think twice; Oh no, think more than twice. Waktu nggak bisa dibalikin. Kesempatan itu mahal harganya, boy :) Jangan kamu kira bisa bolak-balik singgah ke aku dan dia kayak halte bis. Aku bukan cuma sekedar rumah singgah. Aku istana kolosal yang pintunya belum berhasil terbuka dengan baik. Gembok pagernya sampe hampir karatan tuh, nunggu seseorang yang bisa minyakin. Haha (˘⌣˘ )

InsyaAllah, itu bukan kamu. Kamu udah jahat. Pergi, cari aja mainan lain. Aku terlalu bagus buat jadi mainanmu. Beli aja di loakan, kalo tujuanmu cuma main-kalo-bosen-buang :)

Aku nggak nangis lho. Paling tidak, sudah mereda. Aku sadar air mataku terlalu berharga buat kamu. Inget itu baik-baik ya :)

Oh, ya mending kamu cepetan pergi deh. Males liat mukamu sih. Btw, aku pemaaf dan bukan pendendam. Jadi nggak usah sampe sujud-sujud di kakiku gitu, lagi ;) Bye!

smirk,

#2

Hey Haaaayy people! Still in contact with your own blogger? Ask to myself, I'll answer, "Yes, Iam." Because I have a looot of things I wanna share. Haha, iya lagi banyak bahan :) This time, I got another new status. Check it out..

Just that for today. Day by day her status is getting awrrsomeee  (~‾▿‾)~ Yeah, aku mangkel but can't do anything. Thanks anw :) Online and keep reading my blog! I'll update her status routinely ahahaaa :D

evil grin,

Stopping is Not That Simple

I've decided to stop.

Stop our contact, messages, jokes and make it looks like really just between 'friends'. Before my love getting bigger.. Before the feeling to have him getting stronger..

Aku udah curhat sana-sini, ya emang tipikal gampang panik dan nggak bisa mikir sendiri. And most of them said that I gotta stop. He's already been taken, that's the main reason. Mau dianggep cewek apa aku ini? Bisa-bisa kalo si R tau, langsung gembar-gembor bilang aku mau ngerebut. And neither me nor my friends want that happen.

Him : We are just friends, ga lebih :)

Me : Yes, I know. Justru itu, nggak usah smsan kalo kamu nggak ada masalah.

Him : Aku cuma pengen punya temen, kalo kamu nggak suka ya udah.

Me : Pacarmu bisa salah paham. Aku gak pengen itu bikin kalian tengkar.

Him : Hm, oke. Smsan seperlunya aja kan? Iya.

And it just ended like that. Easy, huh? Not for me. Don't you know it is too hard for me? Mess and confused. I dont know what I really feel. Whether this regret? My tears fall and could not be stopped...

messy,

I Can't Keep Holding on You

Untung aku nggak punya niat 'merebut'. Atau memanfaatkan status 'jomblo'nya karena diputusin tiba-tiba beberapa hari yang lalu. Because if I really did that, something happen today will crack my heart...

I dont know what to say. I was sitting on a chair in my school lobby with some friends. We were waiting for junior high school kids who want to register the national exam Try Out, held by our school student council. It was this afternoon and quite cloudy. I haven't come home yet. He has already. I was talking and joking with my friends, laughing together, but then it just stopped by her coming. Word her refers to? Ah, you do know who I am talking about.

One of my friends, Kiki, said hi to her, and started conversation. Actually Kiki was in the same Junior High School like where she is studying now, so it's not a big deal to know that they're close. Okay, I'm tired of using the word 'her' to mention his girlfriend, let's now use her initial. R. 

R came with two friends, and they intended to sign up for the Try Out. I was just silent and helping Melly to write down their name in the participants list while R still talked with Kiki. They were talking about anything, unimportant I think. But then my ears opened wider when I heard his name called. I didn't mean to overhear, I  have ears and still work well. So I just kept hearing their talks..

Akhirnya aku sampai ke pembicaraan di mana si R cerita kalo mereka putus. Kiki said that she's not too surprised. That's a normal thing, habis gini juga balikan lagi kok. And you know guys? Si R membenarkannya. Dia bilang, "emang udah balik kok mbak."

I mean WHAT?! Jantung kayak mau copot dengernya. Aku yakin nggak salah denger. But it was really rwellee startling me. Oh, I'm shocked! Aku udah memikirkannya, mereka pasti balik, tha's why aku nggak mau macem-macem. Tapi, he didn't even say anything to me! Nothing! Dia cuma meyakinkan kalo emang udah putus, dan seperti nggak tertarik membahas itu lagi. And the thing I hate the most is that we're still texting since right after the break up tragedy until now. He just act that everything's going normal. Ironic!  

"And I'm becoming discouraged, confused, and particularly scared. You automatically will be back to your girl and leave me alone, hopeless..."

hopeless,

Wooed!

Bonne journee, everybody! I'm posting again after two days off. So sowwyy, because of being busy in running the KTS, I couldn't go online and type everything I've been through along this two days. Yeah, now I'm here, right? So it just doesn't even matter ahahaa.

Okay, now is drizzling, and gonna be a heavy rain in quick time. Aku baru aja sampe rumah. KTS emang selesai jam sebelas siang, tapi tugasku banyak, termasuk jadwal syuting buat film agama. Iya, syuting dan syuting, udah kayak artis ibukota ajeh  (⌣_⌣) Terkadang mikir "ada-ada aja tuh guru suruh bikin film", tapi mau gimana lagi dong? Dan jadilah begini, capek banget mondar-mandir lokasi syuting sehabis ngurusin KTS. Pulang sore-sore, malemnya juga nggak pasti istirahat tenang di rumah. Luckily, aku pulang ini nggak kehujanan, fiuhh.. Enggak dulu deh buat ujan-ujanan, tipikal gampang pusing ya gini ini, repot -___-"

Terus, udah kayak gini masih ada aja yang ngajak jalan. Nyahahaa bukan "nge-date", cuma ikut dateng di upacara pembukaan lomba olahraga gitu lah di Giri Krida. Kinda such a building buat bulutangkis atau tenis. Sebenernya emang capek, tapi aku juga males di rumah -__- Nggak bisa nolak, aku pasti cabut langsung ke sana. Well, kalo nggak hujan (¬_¬) sebel. Tau sapa yang ngajak? 'Him'. Awwww nggak nahan pengen berangkaaaat T.T dia emang dipilih jadi perwakilan OSIS buat ke sana, dan aku nggak tau apa-apa. Kita sempet smsan bentar sebelum acaranya dimulai, dia kayak maksa aku ke sana gitu. I can't pretend anymore, so I just said "I'm sleepy".

Me  : Nggak ganggu? Upacara kok bisa smsan?

Him : Enggak, belum dimulai kok. Kamu ke sini dong...

Me  : Um, gak bisa. Aku baru sampe rumah masa' pergi lagi, capek.

Him : Tak jemput weees :p

Me  : Gilak. Hujan lho :o

Him : Ya nggak papa, paling basah. Asal kamu ke sini hehee..

Me  : *shy* Eh, nggak deh, repot kamunya. Lagian gak tau rumahku kan?

Him : Makanya kasih tauuu.. Rumahmu di mana? :p

Me  : Heh, males! Gak usah, wes sana upacara aja. Aku ngantuk.

Him : Ya udah deh, ini mau mulai. Kamu bobok aja, bye :)

Ahhh.. sekarang udah mulai upacaranya. Dan bener, hujannya mulai deres. So I decide to lie on a mattress and take few minutes rest. It's useful actually, cause I'm tired. Malam ini aku harus keluar lagi, latihan buat pensi besok. Ya, hari ketiga KTS adalah jadwal tampil pensi tiap kelas sesuai undian. Dan paginya berangkat jam 5 seperti hari pertama. What an exhausted! Yeah, stop sighing, really feel sleepy, Gbyee people :D

sleepeee,

Loving You is... Forbidden :(

They broke up. And it just did not end well.

We texted from about 2 hours ago, and it was there he told me the complete story. I've told you before that we're just like bestfriends, right? We share problems and give the solution? Yeah, that's what we just did. He, at least.

Itu bukan yang pertama kali, atau kedua dan ketiga. That is just like their 'habits' in making the relationship work. What a weird way -__- Their relationship has been running long enough, 1 year and 4 months. But I never really understand why they often quarreled. Even because of small things. Nggak ngerti dan heran. Aku jadi mikir, mereka ini masih saling sayang atau enggak. Dan si cewek yang selalu mengakhiri hubungan. Hmm not a good decision..

Aku bukan dokter cinta, or person who experts in romance. Aku cuma cewek biasa yang udah hampir 3 tahun jomblo, nggak manggil cowok manapun dengan panggilan spesial kayak "sayang", "sweety, atau "beybeh". Maybe sounded very strange when I'm saying "You can't be like that to your boyfriend" or "JANGAN SELINGKUH!" karena kamu pasti mikir aku nggak tau apa-apa. Tapi bertindak sebagai seorang normal, menurutku sembarangan ngomong "Putus" bukanlah hal yang bijaksana. Bisa bikin capek dan males. Nggak interest lagi buat ngelanjutin hubungan. That's what he said. He didn't even want to give an explanation to her. "Biarin aja, aku udah capek." Hh, and I just couldn't say anything but "sabar ya.. kalo masih sayang juga balik kok. Dia masih emosi."

The bad thing is... that 'break up' news had just awakened the evil side of me. There's a bit happy feeling inside my heart. A bit, really ⌣́_⌣̀. Well I don't wanna pretend a thing, but that little feeling has successfully made me jump around  ~(‾▿‾)~. I dont have any plan to, you know if you have thought it, take him or something. I'm not that insane, geez! I love him, yeah but dont want to take that so far. We're still bestfriends, that's enough for me. At least this time :)

"When you decided to have a crush in someone, and start a serious relationship with him, you have to commit it. Do it well, as best as you can. Problems come daily, maybe hourly. But use it to make you better. Face it together, don't just run like saying 'break up' words without hard-thinking. Childish. And later, you'll realize that your heart still belong to him and want him back to your side." -Me  

loving...

GOTCHA! I've Found You :p

Heyyaaaa world! 

Welcome back with me here, on my online journal. What's your bussiness lately? I mean things that really make you busy until feel-like-can't-breath. Do you have any? I have one, not really drain my time but busy enough. I with my couple of friends are organize a mid-term activity, which is always held after examination. But, this time we hold this event earlier, just to fill the three-free days. Did I say 'free day of school'? Yeah, I really mean it. What a surprise actually, extra bonus in my school!    \(´▽`)/

It doesn't happen without a reason, ofc. My eleven grader seniors are going to have a trip to Bali. Kinda such a routine when we enter the eleven grade. And some teachers are going to come with them. Then the twelve graders are still staying at school, 'eating' lessons. There are only we left, the ten graders, so I and some friends as members of Students Organization will take care of it. It's really tiring, but cool! Ahahaa wish we luck and can organize this well ;)

Anyway, talk about love... there's nothing :D Yeah, still the same, no desire in having boyfriend. Yet. But, you may know, I think I'm interested in someone. Yahohoooo  ~(‾▿‾)~

A bit description, he's my class neighbor. Our class adjacent. He's impressive and looks really gentle. Kind, cheerful, and talkative enough. Orangnya humoris dan JAIL banget  (¬_¬") Aku udah tau dia dari awal sih, tapi cuma sekedar tau. Dan baru dekat akhir-akhir ini, as friends. Teman curhat, tepatnya. Kita share masalah cukup banyak dan saling memberi nasihat. Sifatnya yang jail itu bikin aku kesel abis -___-" Dia OSIS juga kayak aku, sekarang jadi ketupel KTS (Kegiatan Tengah Semester). Sempet aku ditunjuk dia jadi sekretarisnya, tapi noway deh yaa lagi capek-capeknya hh. 

Bad news-nya adalah.. He's already taken. Unavailable! Oh c'mon babe, I'm loving a wrong person. Hubungan dia sama si pacar yang notabene masih kelas 9 SMP cukup lama, setahun 4 bulan. Tapi ricuh, banyak masalah, dan sering tengkar ga jelas. Dia curhat banyak tentang itu ke aku, bikin panas aja :o Haaah really bad :( Tapi no problem lah, tujuanku kenal dia nggak buat pedekate kok, rasa suka ini muncul sekarang-sekarang aja. Dan belum tumbuh besar, jadi harus cepet-cepet dikontrol.

Okay, world enough today's posting. Seeya later with another 'him' story! :p

randoms,